Fussing and Fighting

Posted by Brian Newman on August 22, 2011
Posted in: Chicks. 1 Comment

Did you look at another girl? Were you not listening to her when she said something important? Did you piss off one of her girlfriends? Were you drunk with the boys all day and all night? Did you miss your anniversary? Accidentally kill her dog? There are so many stupid decisions that men make on a daily basis. No matter what it was that pushed her over the edge, you know what you did wrong…(most of the time)… and it’s time to make things right. 

This could take anywhere from 2 minutes up to a lifetime depending on the level of infringement and injustice you have caused her. Having a partner is never a small task and a couple is always going to have differences of opinion and a bit of conflict. It’s the right balance of conflict and resolution can make for a strong and healthy relationship. You just have to remember to listen and be attentive to what she is talking about. Make her love and respect you for being yourself and being honest with her. She wants to hear you say sweet things and treat her better. Don’t just sit there at your own pity party mean muggin’ like this 30’s tough guy. This guy is never gonna get another date with anybody. Even the bird in the mirror doesn’t like what she sees. 

Just admit you were wrong. You have to honestly and sincerely apologize for your behavior. Let her know you care about her and what she has to say. If you act like it’s her fault and disagree with her it will just prolong the conflict, no one will be happy and it will eventually ruin the relationship. Even if she is wrong just listen to her complain about what is bothering her and when she gets done she will feel better. Most of the time they are not even mad at YOU!! They love you and care enough about you to bitch at you. They are mad about the job, the guy that objectified her on the street on the way to your place or they have on their cozy monthly sweatpants. Women just want you to listen. I can’t stress this ManLaw enough. They don’t want solutions, suggestions or guidance. Just LISTEN!! Make her feel comfortable telling you whats bothering her and just let her cry and get it all out. 

You should be doing this always anyways, but when she’s upset, you have to treat her like a lady. Sending some flowers to her while she’s at work or having the house clean and dinner ready with some candles and wine the next time she comes over for a visit. The ladies are really big on the little things you do for them. You have to go out of your way to show her you care.  Open the door, pull her chair out, say sweet sexy things to her. (If I have to explain to you how to treat her you should read my other posts)

Women have the ability to say things without saying a word. She’s not just gonna tell you what she wants to hear. That would be way too easy and it’s their job to make us squirm a little bit. It’s telling them how gorgeous they are every day or bringing them a glass of seltzer in bed without them asking you. As members of the opposite sex we have to learn to understand these social cues and use them for betterment of Man. The more in tune with her you are, the less you will fight and the better the make up lovin’ when you do get into it. 

In closing, just plain old Common Sense will get you through these tough times of distress. There is no magic harmony that descends upon you when you fall in love. Love is a beautiful thing but at some point you will disagree about something. Theres no tricks or games that speed her healing process. Some of the best parts of a relationship is getting to know each other better and a good fight is a pretty good way to get to know someone. To our benefit, boys, to a certain extent they want us to screw up. If you don’t do some bad things once in a while the chicks wouldn’t even talk to you, let alone invite you to her boudoir. 

So keep rocking fellas. It’s all good. 

Stay tuned for more ManLawMonadays…

Men of Distinction

Posted by Brian Newman on August 8, 2011
Posted in: Influential Men. 1 Comment

There are few outstanding men throughout history that have elevated style and moral consciousness to another level. Fine gentlemen share many traits and characteristics. One thing found commonly is Individuality. Another is not conforming to the norms of society and pushing the boundaries of your own mind. Part of being a man is learning to be your own person. To strive for excellence in everything you do and to be comfortable in your own skin while you do it. If you can do this Victory is yours. 

We may wear the same color suit sometimes, but the swagger in our personalities and our joy for living is what really makes a man unique. Here Frank “the Voice” Sinatra and Dean “the King of Cool” Martin give a little taste of their own personalities. 


Marlin Brando is another man of distinction. It takes a lot of class, pride and integrity for yourself and those who share the space around you. This man of many hats has many times over qualified himself in this category. (Playing Stanley Kowalski or Don Corleone won’t hurt your chances either) Although his later troubles overshadow some of his career success,’ we cannot over look his classic sense of style nor his dedication to the civil rights of African and Indian-Americans.  A consummate activist and humanitarian he lead not only with his acting but with his heart. Jack Nicohlson once said about the man, “…it was always Marlon Brando and always will be Brando.” A true testament to the strength of a mans work and dedication to his fellow man. 

In part one of this 1965 interview we see how poised and relaxed he is, while flirting and keeping the press on their corporate toes. 

Last but certainly not least for this installment of ManLawMondays, is another man that went his own way and also managed to help out as many people as he could on the way there. He was persecuted heavily in his early career about his morals, his philosophy, his publication and his way of life. He stuck to his guns, took the beating with style and rose above to stay true to his beliefs and values. Hugh Hefner was not only a magazine mogul but a civil rights activist and political ally of women and the gay community. He was influential in hiring African-American comedian and civil rights leader, Dick Gregory and in 1955 he published Charles Beaumont’s short story, “The Crooked Man,” about straight men being persecuted in a world where homosexuality was the norm. Mr. Hefner responded in his magazine shortly thereafter, “If it was wrong to persecute heterosexuals in a homosexual society then the reverse was wrong, too.”

Mr. Hefner shuts down hater William Buckley in 1966. 

A real man of distinction is always a gentleman, he is well dressed and well versed in his own opinions. He is polite, honest, courteous and helpful whenever he can be. In closing, I would like to leave you with a quote from one of the original men of distinction. 

“All men can see these tactics whereby I conquer, but what none can see is the strategy out of which victory is evolved.” -Sun Tzu

Date Night 101

Posted by Brian Newman on August 2, 2011
Posted in: Chicks. Tagged: , , , , . 4 Comments

So you met a girl you think you like. You enjoy her company so much you want to take her out on the town for dinner and drinks. 

Here’s a few Man Laws for dating etiquette.

1. If you initiate the date you should be expected to pay for it. This works both ways.

2. Dress to Kill. You don’t want her to show up in heels, looking sexy and you got on a Kiss T-shirt you haven’t washed in a month. 

3. Hold open the door for her when you go anywhere together. 

4. Ask her about her. What she is into? What does she like to do? No one like someone who talks about themselves all night. 

5. If you have a car, make a plan to pick her up at her place. Get out of the car and ring the doorbell and wait for her to come out. This could be anywhere from 5 to 30 minutes. Get used to it. Also when you drop her off walk her to the door. Make sure she gets in the house. Do not just drop her off and take off. 

6. Always open the car door for her. When entering or exiting the car. Even if she opens the door before you when she gets out, she will notice that you came around to her side to offer your hand with the door and to help her out of the car in those 6 inch heels. 

7. A simple bouquet of flowers is a nice touch. Do NOT bring a dozen roses to a first date. You’ll scare her away. 

8. When the waiter arrives to greet the table make sure you let her order her cocktail first. Don’t jump in and order before her. Ever.

9. A date is supposed to be two people getting to know each other. Listen to her and pay attention to what she says. Chicks love a guy who listens an remembers what they say.

10. Always treat her with respect. If she thinks you just want to take her home you’ll never get to. 

11. Learn to speak “woman.” If she says hesitates and says she doesn’t care where you guys have a drink after dinner. She certainly does. Find out what she really wants. (that is a whole ‘nother post, fellas,so don’t concentrate too much on this. This skill takes years to learn and then you’ll still be wrong)

12. Go hard or go home. If you really like this bird you gotta go the extra mile to treat her like a queen.

13. Don’t get too personal about her love life. Never her ask her about her last boyfriend or how many people she’s been with. She probably won’t tell the truth and you don’t want to know anyways.

14. Keep the conversation on her. You guys will talk about a lot of different things. Make sure the conversation isn’t too one sided.  

15. If she leaves the table for any reason, stand up when she gets to the table. Never sit down before she does. 

16. If you guys hit it off and had a great time make sure she knows you’ll call her soon for another date. Leave the rest of the stuff for other dates. Sex on the first date hardly ever works out in the long run. It’s fun as hell but if you really like her get a nice kiss in before you open the cab door, get her in and slip the cabbie a 20 for her fare. 

17. Inversely, If she’s not the girl for you its okay to be polite and retire to your respective homes. It’s fine to say, “Thanks, I had a good night.” Don’t make excuses about why you’re going home.  A gentleman doesn’t make excuses. 

18. Keep continuity throughout the night. If you took her to a nice restaurant, take her to a nice place for drinks.

19. Be a Man.

20. Last but not least, if you guys do go home together, keep the juicy details to yourself. Your boys may want to know how good it was but a gentleman never tells.  

If you follow these tips, I promise you will have stronger relationships and better nights out on the town. 

Stay tuned for more ManLawMondays…

Keep It Old School

Posted by Brian Newman on July 23, 2011
Posted in: Style. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , . 1 Comment

There are many reasons people dress the way they do. Some dress to fit in a certain crowd, some just get by wearing what they’re used to and some set trends and influence the people around them. How we look is the first thing a person notices before hearing what you have to say, what you do for bread or what brand of whiskey turns you on. If you always put your best foot forward and look your best, others will take notice and respect you more for it. Lately our sense of taste has been desensitized by the constant badgering from media and other social outlets. Generations before us show that our commerce and cultures have always dictated what people are wearing at the time. For example, the brightly colored fabrics that were widely available in the 20’s quickly made way for the dark and muted fabrics of the 30’s and the Great Depression. People change with the times, it’s been going on since Adam and Eve. I don’t need to give you the history about what influences style (Google is widely available) but a return to Classicism and Romanticism would be a breath of fresh Chanel. Keep it Old School.

Here is the original “Scarface” doing just that with some well dressed muscle.  

Al Capone

Men used to get their style cues from the Silver Screen and newspapers. Today we slouch in front of a computer all day being bombarded with twitter vomit, invites from ill-rehearsed bands and Cialis ads. I can’t lie to you, I too am guilty of this generational attachment to the glowing apple. The modern Pandora’s box that can connect you to millions once you lift the lid. It can also be detrimental to your heart and your soul. What we’re watching, buying and what we listen to commands our lifestyle decisions. Whether you’re searching for vintage cufflinks and silk ties or scanning the Old Navy website for sweet deals is up to you. 

Fred Astaire

My mother used to say garbage in, garbage out and she was right. If you watch MTV all day, buy Ed Hardy and listen to 30 Seconds to Mars you’re going to look and act like garbage. If you’re checking out old Fred Astaire movies, listening to Frank Sinatra and spending time creating a wardrobe that fits who you are, you’re gonna start looking and acting like a real man. You’re social etiquette will greatly improve as will your quality of life. I’m not saying act like its 1940. Don’t cancel your internet, renounce your IPod and get a Pennsylvania 6-5000 phone number. I’m just saying that todays influx of laziness and accessibility leaves the common man little room for good manners and individuality.

Back in the day when men went to a party and they all had to wear the same white tie, black tux, white vest, they made it their own by small details. Notice these Hollywood kings sporting different shaped bow ties, their vests are cut differently and their pocket squares are all very distinctly folded. Theres nothing like the old days strutting around Hollywood, drinking champagne and sporting very fine bespoke tuxedos. You think these guys went home alone that night? I’ll bet my Cadillac that the answer is No. 

Clark Gable, Van Heflin, Gary Cooper and Jimmy Stewart. New Year’s Eve, 1957

If you always keep it old school you’ll always be right. 

Stay tuned for more ManLawMondays…


Style Is Not Always About What You Wear

Posted by Brian Newman on July 18, 2011
Posted in: Chicks, Style. Tagged: , , , , , , . Leave a comment

If you only listen to one thing I say, this will be the one that will up your game a hundred fold.

ALWAYS BE A GENTLEMAN

No matter what. Keep your cool and do the right thing…

I was at a fine establishment called “the Johnson’s” the other night. (We call it “Sock Bar” because thats what it smells like) What they lack in aroma they make up for with a well hustled pool table, ice cold budweiser and jukebox that only sucks if you do too. 

As the boys and I quickly drank harder and played pool better, I noticed this guy walk in with a girl. He didn’t open the door to the bar for her, walked in front of her to the last seat available at the bar, sat down and ordered himself a PBR. Then had the stones to turn around and asked her if she wanted a beer.  A beer?? Come on guy, ask her if she’d like a drink. If you only have enough money for beer, buy a bottle of wine and cook her a pasta dinner at your place.  Pasta Puttanesca and a bottle of wine are cheap, so if your low on dough its the better move. Don’t take her to the bar downstairs from the apartment your dad pays for if you can’t afford to do it right. 

I don’t care if it’s the dive of all dives or a swank Grammy after party. Both kinds of parties are great, but when you walk in anywhere with a woman, if you’re dating or not, you open the door and offer her the seat at the bar. A gentleman always stands if a woman is standing. (That goes the same for the train, bus, park bench, etc) If she declines then by all means take the seat, but at least you stood up and showed her that she could have it if she wants it. If she pays you no mind, her friend next to her or someone else at the bar will notice your manners and think of you in a better light. Chivalry is not just for who you are with. It’s the simple things that people notice the most. Let the lady go in line in front of you. Open her car door for her. Pick up the check. Carry her over a puddle. Be that well dressed knight.

She was dressed up in some sexy heels, her makeup all done, nails painted and a had on a hot summer dress. This cat looked like he just walked out of a Williamsburg Tattoo/Hair Salon/Clothing Store/Bar. (That actually exists. I wish I had thought of it. I think they are getting rich over there off of Meeker Ave, pumping out hipsters one credit card swipe at a time) If you’re gonna take a woman out on the town and she says she’s getting dressed up, do yourself a favor and put a little effort into your wardrobe too. If you value her at all, you’ll treat her with respect, before someone else does. This guy had absolutely no class and guys with no class make us all look bad, fellas.  If it was the 1800’s I would have smacked him with my silk glove, challenged him to a duel, had a very a brief gun fight and taken his woman out for a nice steak dinner. 

The bottom line is that, style is not always about what you wear. It’s how you carry yourself. You could have tattoos and a t-shirt and jeans or a bespoke suit with Cartier cufflinks. Your clothes will not save you from being an idiot. Only the man in the clothes can do that.  Impress with selfless acts and do things that serve you no purpose but to better the people around you. Rather than acting “cool” treating people badly. 

Selfishness is something gentlemen do not possess. It is for the weak of mind and heart. Being a good person will get you much farther along in life and people of both sexes will respect you that much more for it.  

Stay tuned for more ManLawMondays…

If The Suit Don’t Fit

Posted by Brian Newman on July 12, 2011
Posted in: Style. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , . Leave a comment

There are few classic items in a mens casual wardrobe that will remain timeless until we are all vying for gold plated Versace space boots. Heres three summer items that will make you look and feel better and are easy on your wallet and the eyes.

Item 1: T-shirt

The T-shirt must be Fitted. (by fitted I mean it should be snug but not too tight) should be white with no stains. Unless its grease from changing your own oil and other stuff men get dirty doing in a white t-shirt. Black is acceptable as well but white is more old school. They are the same short sleeved, crew necked, white cotton t-shirts the U.S. Navy issued during the Spanish American War. You can’t go wrong with something men have been doing for over a hundred years. With your smokes in your sleeve, rolled up or not its always a good go to. Here are two great examples of the classic fitted T-shirt from two kings of cool.


Item 1: Jeans

A great pair of jeans can make or break the way you look. Go to different Jean stores and try on as many as it takes to get the right fit. Levi’s are very classic and have been manufactured since the 1850’s, they can and should also be tailored. It’s cheap and well worth it. It’s only $4 to $15 dollars depending on how much you need to take in. Many tailors can do it in a couple hours.  

I would not suggest buying designer brand jeans. They are way too expensive and you’re still buying off the rack. They probably won’t fit you right anyway. If you have some money to blow and want a really nice pair, google a custom jean maker. You shouldn’t pay any more than $300-400 depending on the quality of denim you want. 

Classic indigo blue that have been worn in are perfect. Black is a great way to rock too. You have to pick the color that most describes who you are and what kind of look you are going for… and now I give you the King ladies and gentleman. 

James Dean

Item 3: The Belt and Buckle

Check out Elvis’ and James’ belts. Your belt should be the right size in width and in length. Your belt should always match your shoes. (Unless you are wearing white or cream Chuck Taylors, then black or brown is cool) The buckle is a great way to show off who you are. Find different buckles to accentuate your style. 

Stay tuned for more ManLawMondays…

The Simpler the Better

Posted by Brian Newman on July 11, 2011
Posted in: Chicks, Influential Men, Style. 4 Comments

Cary Grant said that “All it takes are a few simple outfits. And there’s one secret – The Simpler The Better.”

Style is not about what you wear, it’s how you put it together.  Its about wearing things that bring out your personality.  You should feel good when you step out the door for a night out.  Don’t force it and keep it simple.

See how Mr. Grant does it right with a white shirt, a black suit and a black silk tie. You can’t see it in the picture but I am sure he was also wearing freshly shined shoes.  Even the Oxford style button down collar (that now cheaply adorn  the “working man” and “weekend warriors” in a variety of  pastel colors…gross)  Also, notice the different color pocket square… This is how a simple outfit reflects your own personal taste. We have to be thorough in your dress and leave no details out.
This is clothing matching personality to a T. 

Cary Grant

Keeping it simple will ensure that you look and feel your best all the time. People will pay attention to the small details if you do as well. You probably already have a black suit in your closet that you only wear to weddings and funerals. Do yourself and the people around you a favor and take it to the tailor!!! For 30 or 40 dollars you could get it altered and really feel good about rocking it.  Hang up the khakis and the polo shirt. (in fact burn them both) and get right. The next time you meet a girl on a Friday night in your freshly pressed and tailored suit you’ll thank me and she will too…. I promise.